tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4251105006053567742012-02-16T20:48:05.596-05:00Ashleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00855980162476429964noreply@blogger.comBlogger11100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-425110500605356774.post-54444531502661690132007-12-21T00:00:00.001-05:002007-12-21T10:17:57.651-05:00<p><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:85%;">i texted alex tonight and said i wasn't going to give the baby up for adoption. and then he wanted me to get online to talk. (when he says, "why you weren't on it," he's talking about my birth control. which i did not lie about by the way. i accidently messed it up and didn't tell him, which isn't a lie. it's just as bad, but i don't want anyone thinking i just told him i was on it and actually wasn't. it was an honest mess up.)</span></p><p><br /><a id="spamLink" contenteditable="false" onclick="window.external.proxy.reportSpam();event.returnValue=" href="http://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=425110500605356774#" unselectable="on"><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:85%;"></span></a><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:85%;">razors85: how long or many years do i have to take care of it?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: until it's 18<br />razors85: why that long?<br />razors85: why not until its a todler?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc that's how long you'd have to pay child support<br />razors85: so how come what i want has never happened yet?<br />razors85: but everything u want has happened?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: me being pregnant has gone my way, everything before hand went your way<br />HawaiianPunch 00: so i don't want to hear you whine<br />razors85: oh really<br />razors85: apparently not<br />razors85: cause if it did then this wouldnt have happened<br />razors85: this all could have been avoided<br />razors85: all u had to say is hey im not on it so yea thought id let u know<br />razors85: but no<br />razors85: didnt even bother<br />razors85: now u threaten me about doing stuff<br />razors85: fuck my life up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm not threatening you<br />razors85: then make me do shit that u want<br />razors85: u have before<br />razors85: dont even tell me u havent<br />razors85: u told me that u could take care of it by urself cause ur friend doesnt make that guy pay<br />razors85: or do anything<br />razors85: so why not me?<br />razors85: why are u doing this to me<br />razors85: u know i dont want to do anything with this<br />razors85: why cant u respect that<br />razors85: why cant u just keep ur word<br />razors85: u said ur friend is doign fine<br />razors85: on her own<br />razors85: u probalby will too<br />razors85: i cant do this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ok i don't know what friend you're talking about<br />razors85: u told me that someone u know had a kid and the dad didnt want to do anything with it and she RESPECTED that wish from him and kept her word and now shes doing fine<br />razors85: yes u told me on the phone<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i talked about a girl who has the guy pay 600 a month<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but she doesn't take care of her kid either<br />razors85: not morgan<br />razors85: before that<br />razors85: like a month or two<br />razors85: when u said u could take care of it cause u dont want me around if i dont care<br />razors85: so i said ok<br />razors85: that lasted 3 weeks<br />razors85: before that u told me that someone u knew had a kid and the girl was fine on her own<br />razors85: he didnt have to pay support at all or anything<br />razors85: so why are u tearing me apart?<br />razors85: do u enjoy it?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: the only other girl i know with a kid, the dad is in jail<br />razors85: cause i really think u do<br />razors85: for what?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't know<br />razors85: thats not the one u told me<br />razors85: so is that a lie then?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't know what you're talking about<br />HawaiianPunch 00: who<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what girl<br />razors85: u never told me her name<br />razors85: u jsut said a girl u know<br />razors85: this was when my parents found out<br />razors85: so now ur going to drag me down with u<br />razors85: im not going to be a good dad like this<br />razors85: cause i never wanted this<br />razors85: but u cant respect that or anything<br />razors85: its about u and the kid<br />razors85: thast all<br />razors85: and u told me that were in this together<br />razors85: no thats a lie<br />razors85: if we were then both our wishes would happen<br />razors85: all of urs ahve<br />razors85: none of mine have<br />razors85: NONE<br />razors85: dont tell me they have<br />razors85: thats bullshit<br />razors85: and u know it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: are you done now?<br />razors85: for now<br />razors85: wait<br />razors85: if i was to pay then thats around 7200 dollars a year ok<br />razors85: i dont have that kinda money<br />razors85: that means i couldnt go to school<br />razors85: till 18 is around 129ish<br />razors85: 129000<br />razors85: k<br />razors85: now seeing if every now and then would be very very hard for me<br />razors85: cause i need to keep making money so i can go to school<br />razors85: and get a job afterwards<br />razors85: but ur tearing that down<br />razors85: and u dont care<br />razors85: u say u do but if u did then u would leave me alone<br />razors85: and keep ur word<br />razors85: u really dont need me and u know u dont cause u said u know what to do and yes u said those words. u want to bring me down and suffer<br />razors85: u want to try and change my feeligns and its not working<br />razors85: it will never work<br />HawaiianPunch 00: now are you done?<br />razors85: yes<br />razors85: but<br />razors85: does any of that matter<br />razors85: what i just said?<br />razors85: and be honest<br />razors85: cause i really dont think it does<br />HawaiianPunch 00: well if you'd stop talking i can go back and read it all<br />razors85: go ahead<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't even know what you want me to say<br />razors85: i want u to keep ur word that u told me a while ago<br />razors85: that ud leave me alone and that u could do this by urself<br />razors85: but see that wont happen because nothing ive wanted has happened yet<br />razors85: u think about it.... but u dont see it how i see it which is where we'll be<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i wanted us to date, you didn't. that happened<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't want to sneak in basements in the middle of the night to hook up. you did. that happened<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't want an abortion<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't want adoption<br />HawaiianPunch 00: there, we're even<br />razors85: i didnt want to even come close to sex without birth control.... that didnt happen<br />razors85: no were not even<br />razors85: u didnt keep ur word<br />razors85: that happened<br />razors85: not what i wanted<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what about back in april when you said you'd date me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you broke your promise<br />razors85: first of all id never promise anyone that id date them<br />razors85: ever<br />razors85: so idk why u think i said that but believe me i would never say that<br />razors85: in a million years<br />razors85: i couldnt promise somethign liek that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ok let's say you didn't promise<br />razors85: and u wanna know why i didnt<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you still said it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and you still got your way<br />razors85: why i didnt is because i didnt liek ur morals<br />razors85: i didnt like most things about u<br />razors85: cause u got pissy real fast<br />razors85: about stupid shit<br />razors85: u talked about things i didnt want to talk about<br />razors85: dont ask me what they were<br />HawaiianPunch 00: that's a real good reason not to date someone<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and why didn't you say something. i would have stopped<br />razors85: u woulda gotten pissed<br />HawaiianPunch 00: on<br />razors85: i bet u anything u would have<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no*<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i've talked about those things with plenty of guys<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and every boy i've dated<br />razors85: uve dumped<br />HawaiianPunch 00: has told me to chill<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i've done it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no. i've been dumped. and got my heart broken in the mean time<br />razors85: yeah<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what i'm saying, is that i work with people ic are about<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't say f you for not liking me<br />razors85: and people told me u had sex with kirk and braggeda bout it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i change the things i can change<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't have sex with kirk<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i touched his dick. woo hoo<br />razors85: not what people said<br />razors85: but u knw what<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ask kirk<br />razors85: i wont believe them<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ask him if we did<br />razors85: all i want. this is the only thing im asking for, but it probably wont happen, but i jsut want to be left alone forever. im not going to be a good parent if i dont want to do this and u know that.<br />razors85: i cant do it for 18 years<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you do things if you WANT to. i've noticed that pattern<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and if you don't want to, hell with even trying<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're good when you want to be<br />razors85: u wanna know my schedule<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't<br />razors85: yeah cause its busy as fuck<br />razors85: i can barely do stuff i wanna do<br />HawaiianPunch 00: yet you're looking for a gf<br />razors85: i havent done somethign for myself since this happened<br />HawaiianPunch 00: thought you were TOO BUSY ALEX<br />razors85: thats when lax was after school<br />razors85: its before school now<br />razors85: who told u that?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: that's the one thing i hated you for the most<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you could look at me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and make me belive you were way too busy for me<br />razors85: did angel tell u that?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: then go date other girls<br />HawaiianPunch 00: makes SO MUCH sense<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're telling me you're too busy for our baby<br />razors85: i dated emily cause lax was almost over<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but now you want another gf?<br />razors85: yeah<br />razors85: i do want one<br />razors85: whats wrong with that?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: nothing<br />razors85: WTF<br />HawaiianPunch 00: except all this time you don't have time for<br />razors85: u jsut made a huge deal outta it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're telling me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you don't have time to be a good dad<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but you have time to date someone<br />razors85: has it been born yet?<br />razors85: that what i thought<br />HawaiianPunch 00: in less than 6 months it will be<br />razors85: sweet<br />HawaiianPunch 00: do you plan on dumping her when it gets here<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i doubt it<br />razors85: idk how long a relationshipt will last<br />razors85: idk what im doing tomorrow<br />HawaiianPunch 00: with you proably not long<br />razors85: i live life day by day<br />razors85: my longest has been 5 months<br />razors85: both have<br />razors85: the first one i got cheated on 5 times<br />razors85: 5 FUCKING TIMES<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i thought amanda was your only gf<br />razors85: the first one was when i ws in 5th grade<br />razors85: and yes amanda was my fist love<br />razors85: first*<br />razors85: and im glad she was<br />razors85: ive never said i love u to another girl since then<br />razors85: if i have its been as like a friend love<br />razors85: so dont u even fuckign think i cant go long with a gf<br />razors85: me and amanda broke up for stupid reasons<br />razors85: so what... let me take a wild guess. that away message that u have is from my facebook message to angel<br />razors85: ccause thats the only way u wouldve known<br />razors85: so now u both are making fun of me<br />razors85: and u want me to take care of this kid<br />razors85: but u do this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ok<br />HawaiianPunch 00: angel and i<br />HawaiianPunch 00: talk about plenty of other things besides you<br />razors85: why do u talk about me?<br />razors85: theres no reason to<br />razors85: besides to make urself feel good<br />HawaiianPunch 00: we both enjoyed listening to you sound so desperate for a girl<br />razors85: im not desparate<br />HawaiianPunch 00: when at one point, you could have had either one of us<br />razors85: yeah i know<br />razors85: peopel fuck up<br />razors85: tahts why were humans<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no doubt<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't blame you for wanting a gf, you think i don't want to a boyfriend? i was never happier than when i was in love with kirk<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i would love to have that again.<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but it's not a good time for me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: honestly, who wants to date a pregnant girl<br />razors85: u coulda avoided that<br />razors85: but now ur bringing me down<br />razors85: for something i never wanted<br />razors85: and u knew it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't want it either<br />razors85: then why couldnt u have fucking told me that u were on it<br />razors85: huh<br />HawaiianPunch 00: why didn't you tell me you couldn't use a frickin condom<br />razors85: it wsa fine<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no it wasn't<br />razors85: ur bc fucked it up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: obviously it wasn't<br />razors85: condoms dont stop everthign<br />HawaiianPunch 00: neither does birth control<br />razors85: ur blaming this whole thign on me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no it's both of us<br />razors85: u said bc was more reliable than a condom<br />HawaiianPunch 00: not by much<br />razors85: u said a condom was like 97 percent and bc was like 99.9<br />razors85: thats a lot when it comes to this<br />razors85: if u would have told me that u werent on it... i never would have put it on<br />razors85: and i put it on right<br />razors85: id fucking know cause it was on me<br />razors85: not u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i was afriad to tell you i wasn't<br />razors85: cause u wanted sex<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />razors85: whats the reason then?<br />razors85: theres no other reason<br />razors85: if u would have respected my feelings then u wouldve told me<br />razors85: but u didnt<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ok well sence you already think you know everything, there's no reason for me to explain<br />razors85: u have nothign to explain<br />razors85: its over and now im fucked<br />razors85: cause its only ur way<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i played your stupid game for 7 months<br />HawaiianPunch 00: I came to YOU when you said so<br />HawaiianPunch 00: don't frickin tell me that you have never gotten what you wanted<br />razors85: thats 7 months ago<br />razors85: u always relate thigns to that<br />razors85: thought u said u were over it<br />razors85: or did u lie to me about that too?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc you made me believe something very different was going on<br />razors85: so did u<br />razors85: except urs was fuckign huge<br />razors85: and ruined my life<br />HawaiianPunch 00: see, i relate everything to march when you made me actually believe that you cared<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and you relate everything to my birth control<br />razors85: i did care<br />razors85: my feelings changed<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no you didn't<br />razors85: just liek urs i guess huh<br />razors85: oh since u know exactly what i feel<br />razors85: yeah good one cheif<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you just said mine did<br />HawaiianPunch 00: an dyou don't know how i felt or feel right now<br />HawaiianPunch 00: so don't talk<br />razors85: hahahaha<br />razors85: good one<br />razors85: u cant even keep ur word<br />razors85: so dotn talk shit to me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: neither can you<br />razors85: why not?<br />razors85: ive kept my word<br />razors85: ive said everything that ive wanted<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i think you're the one that enjoys all of this<br />razors85: now u turn people against me and talk about me behind my back<br />razors85: really<br />razors85: my life fuckgin sucks right now<br />razors85: if urs did then ud stop all of this<br />razors85: but u dont<br />razors85: cause u like to talk shit about people u dont liek<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i can't stop anything<br />razors85: which is fuckign sick<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what i want won't ever happen<br />razors85: i hate people like that<br />razors85: apparently it has to<br />razors85: cause i have to do something for the kid when i dont want to<br />razors85: cause i never wanted it to<br />razors85: an bc and an condom together means no baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i hate you for the ways you make me feel<br />razors85: good<br />razors85: same to u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you can't hurt someone that doesn't care<br />razors85: why not?<br />razors85: says who<br />razors85: u cant say that cause u do care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i meant you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: of couse i care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i hate myself for caring, but i can't help it<br />razors85: i know u meant me<br />razors85: thats why i aimed it towards me<br />razors85: ashley i hate being liek this<br />razors85: watch it walk first, and talk first. then u could give it to adoption. ur going to bring me down too<br />razors85: unless u let me go and respect my wish<br />razors85: thats all i ask<br />razors85: is that u leave me outta this<br />razors85: thats the only thing i want in the world right now<br />HawaiianPunch 00: stop saying that<br />razors85: no<br />razors85: see it doesnt matter what i say<br />razors85: see why im so fuckign pissed?<br />razors85: and u and ur friends think its funny<br />HawaiianPunch 00: really, if nothing matters, why am i crying?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's not funny<br />razors85: like i can see u crying<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you didn't notice when i cried in your basement either<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you don't notice alot of things<br />razors85: if its not funny then why is me wanting a gf funny to u two?<br />razors85: cause maybe i couldnt see<br />razors85: or u didnt show it<br />razors85: if i saw u crying then i wouldve held u<br />razors85: im nto that fuckign mean<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />razors85: yes i wouldve<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you asked if i wanted a tissue<br />razors85: dont fuckign say i woudlnt<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc you heard me sniffing<br />razors85: i thought u had a stuffy nose<br />HawaiianPunch 00: that suddenly just happened<br />razors85: sorry i wsa wrong<br />razors85: usually i have a stuffy nose before i go to bed<br />razors85: almost every night<br />razors85: my nose gets stuffy<br />razors85: amandas does that too<br />razors85: so im not the only one<br />razors85: im not making this shit up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you are so obsessed<br />razors85: no just me and her have a lot im common<br />razors85: im sorry for not forgeting my first love<br />razors85: and u did the same for kirk<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i will always love that boy<br />razors85: well<br />razors85: ill always love amanda<br />razors85: and u act liek its a bad thing<br />HawaiianPunch 00: do i talk about kirks nose<br />razors85: no it just reminded me cause i havre a good memory<br />razors85: sorry for having a good memory<br />razors85: my bad<br />HawaiianPunch 00: don't be such a jerk<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't say you had to be sorry<br />razors85: u implied it<br />razors85: that it was a bad thing to know this stuff<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i know little things about all my ex's too<br />HawaiianPunch 00: that are pretty stupid to remember<br />razors85: ok<br />razors85: so why cant u just keep ur word to me and let me go on with what i want to do<br />razors85: ur keepign me from things i wanna do<br />HawaiianPunch 00: don't play victim<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i can't do anything i want to do either<br />razors85: u have so far<br />razors85: that ive seen<br />razors85: for us<br />razors85: see ur not letting me do what i want<br />razors85: this isnt fair at all<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't get to do what i want either<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i can't say that enough<br />razors85: havent showed it<br />razors85: or told me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: there's a lot of things i don't say<br />razors85: i jsut wanna know why u cant just let me go with what i wanna do and let me be?<br />razors85: why is that so hard to respect?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you need to quit actling like youre 12<br />HawaiianPunch 00: your kid needs you whether you like it or not<br />razors85: u need to start keeping what u say<br />razors85: theres plenty of kids out there who dont have a dad and are fine<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i'm not going to let my kid be one of them<br />razors85: see its about u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's about our baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: YOUR BABY<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you don't get it do you?<br />razors85: no i get it<br />razors85: but i knwo what i want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: then you wouldn't want your kid out there without you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: if you were a good person<br />HawaiianPunch 00: a good dad<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you would want to help your kid<br />razors85: guess im not<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you better learn<br />razors85: why?<br />razors85: whyyyyyyyy are u such a bitch to me<br />razors85: ur so fuckign mean<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm not being a bitch<br />razors85: and u dont even see that u are<br />razors85: yes u are<br />razors85: its alla bout u<br />razors85: dont say its not<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm not thinking about me<br />razors85: cause it is<br />razors85: its right out int he open<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i can't believe a person can care so little about their own kid<br />razors85: thats being human<br />razors85: people are like that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />HawaiianPunch 00: being human<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and being a dad<br />HawaiianPunch 00: is doing anything for your kid<br />HawaiianPunch 00: not trying any way they can to get rid of it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're pathetic<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't even know what to say to that<br />razors85: no u see thats ur view of it<br />razors85: i cant change how u look at it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and all of your friends<br />HawaiianPunch 00: everyone thinks you're such a fucking bastard for what you're doing to your kid<br />HawaiianPunch 00: YOUR BEST FRIENDS<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you have no idea<br />razors85: oh so u did lie to me again<br />razors85: see the thing is that i knew u were still talking shit about me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no<br />razors85: cause erica told me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: your friends find out<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and ask me<br />razors85: really now<br />razors85: lol<br />HawaiianPunch 00: wtf is going on. so i tell them. and i ask them every time. please don't judge him for this.<br />razors85: thats funny cause i dont talk about this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: they hear it<br />razors85: how can they hear it when i dont talk about it to anyone?<br />razors85: u dont make sense<br />HawaiianPunch 00: the school<br />HawaiianPunch 00: people know you said<br />razors85: what i said like 2 months ago<br />razors85: so yeah they change it up<br />razors85: see now ur probably goin to tell them what i say<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't tell your friends anything<br />HawaiianPunch 00: if they believe you, i don't blame them<br />HawaiianPunch 00: they're your friends, not mine<br />razors85: well i dont talk about this to anybody<br />razors85: so idk where ur getting this stuff<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i hear it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: some is probably true<br />HawaiianPunch 00: some probably isn't<br />HawaiianPunch 00: just like everything in life<br />razors85: probably<br />razors85: and see i know whats probaly going to happen<br />razors85: if i do get a gf<br />razors85: some of ur friends are going to decide, hey lets make his life go to hell and theyll say shit to her<br />razors85: which idk if u know this but u really dont wanna see me pissed<br />razors85: it takes a lot to get me to that<br />razors85: but i dont really feel much pain when im pissed<br />razors85: and its been a long time since i have<br />razors85: and since im a lot bigger now<br />razors85: u really dont wanna do that<br />razors85: cause if that does happen<br />HawaiianPunch 00: are you gonna beat me up or something.<br />razors85: ill make u and ur friends lives a fuckign shit hole<br />razors85: and dont think i cant<br />razors85: no im not gonna hit a girl<br />razors85: unless its my little sis and its a joke<br />razors85: we joke punch<br />HawaiianPunch 00: then what does you being big have anything to do with it<br />razors85: its hard to stop me<br />razors85: from doign stuff<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you hurt me, it goes straight to the baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: an di'll have to kill you<br />razors85: really<br />razors85: ud really have the guts to kill me<br />razors85: id wanna see that<br />razors85: but no thats not what i mean<br />razors85: like ur feelings and everything<br />razors85: will go to shit<br />razors85: ill fuck with everything<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you make me feel like shit enough<br />razors85: same to u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: again<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you can't hurt someone that doesn't care<br />razors85: and again u keep thinking that<br />razors85: i know how i feel<br />razors85: and obviiously u dont<br />razors85: and obviously u dont care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i care more than i'm willing to admit<br />razors85: doesnt show one bit<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc there's no reason<br />razors85: ill take care it was much as i can for as long as i can<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what would be the point in me telling you how i feel<br />razors85: but im goign to bed<br />razors85: i hate this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't like it either<br />razors85: whatev<br />HawaiianPunch 00: don't whatever me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm being serious<br />razors85: dont u even fuckign tell me what to do<br />razors85: who the hell do tu think u are<br />HawaiianPunch 00: why do you freak out<br />razors85: cause u think u have me how u want me<br />razors85: down to what u want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's not what i want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's what your child needs<br />razors85: again u keep thinking that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it is<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i want you to care about your kid. and love it enough to want it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i want you to actually give a damn about me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: neither is going to happen<br />HawaiianPunch 00: people think otherwise, and that's when i laugh.<br />razors85: right so why dont u jsut let me go?<br />razors85: other people dont matter in this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc for some reason<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't think you honestly want nothing to do with your kid<br />razors85: no i dont want anyting to do<br />razors85: cause i never wanted this<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't either!<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm sick of you thinking the baby is to blame<br />razors85: i dont blame it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: then why do you freaking hate them so much<br />razors85: no i love kids<br />HawaiianPunch 00: just not your own?<br />razors85: just not one when im 18<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what if you get married, and something happens, and you can't have kids.<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and you lost the only kid you could ever have<br />razors85: ill adopt<br />HawaiianPunch 00: some kid whose dad didn't want them either?<br />razors85: yep<br />razors85: my friend chads liek that<br />razors85: he knows his real parents<br />razors85: and therye all fine<br />razors85: doesnt really talk to them<br />razors85: but hes fine with that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i can't spend 9 months growing with my own child and give them up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm not strong enough<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm so attached<br />razors85: cause u dont take control<br />razors85: u let ur emotions take control<br />HawaiianPunch 00: being pregnant is a very emotional thing<br />razors85: i bet<br />HawaiianPunch 00: the baby is capable of sleeping, SLEEPING<br />razors85: idk what its like so it probalby is<br />razors85: cool<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's 4 inches long and it sleeps and is awake<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and if you shine a flashligh on my belly, the baby would look away from it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm so attached<br />razors85: ashley i dont care<br />razors85: im sorry<br />HawaiianPunch 00: how can you not care<br />razors85: cause i never wanted it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't either!<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but it's happeneing<br />razors85: cause a lie made it happen<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you can dwell on that all you want<br />razors85: how do u think itll feel when it asks u how it wsa made... what are u gonna say<br />razors85: u cant dwell on the truth<br />razors85: how do u think itll feel when u say oh i lied to ur dad<br />razors85: and u were a mistake<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i think it will be greatful i took care of my own "lie"<br />razors85: ever think of that?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i didn't just pass it off on someoe else<br />razors85: really now<br />razors85: i doubt it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ok<br />razors85: cause u cant make it feel a certain way<br />HawaiianPunch 00: how do you think the baby is going to feel when i tell them yes i made a mistake, and daddy was too much of a pussy to take care of you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: he ran off bc he didn't love you<br />razors85: hahahah<br />HawaiianPunch 00: he didn't even give a damn<br />razors85: too bad i cant run off<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm sure they will be rally thrilled to hear that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you want to<br />razors85: well thats two diff things<br />razors85: u should probably think befor u talk<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm still not giving him or her up<br />razors85: oh i know<br />razors85: and i stil lhave no choice<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you have a choice on how you raise it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: if you treat them like just another chore you don't want to do, that's for you to do<br />HawaiianPunch 00: if you want to actually deal with what's happening, and be the best you can be, that's up to you<br />razors85: i know<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i find out january 9th if it's a boy or girl. and believe me, i'll be caling you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i'd like to think maybe that would sink in<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but i doubt it<br />razors85: yep<br />razors85: it wont<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're awful<br />razors85: so are u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: maybe to you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: cry and get over it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm doing what i need for my baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're doing what you need to do for you<br />HawaiianPunch 00: selfish<br />razors85: u cant even keep ur word lol<br />HawaiianPunch 00: stop<br />HawaiianPunch 00: get over it<br />razors85: u get over it then<br />HawaiianPunch 00: what am i getting over<br />razors85: what i want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're not getting away<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm sorry<br />razors85: cause ur not gonna change how i feel<br />razors85: lol<br />razors85: cause u cant keep ur word cause ur a selfish bitch<br />razors85: cause u dont care<br />razors85: ill take care of it as much as i can and when i can. theres no guarentee when i can and cant<br />razors85: i cant fix that<br />razors85: im sorry<br />HawaiianPunch 00: how am i selfish<br />razors85: i dont feel like explaining<br />razors85: cause it wouldnt matter<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc you got nothing<br />HawaiianPunch 00: my entire body ENTIRE BODY is so messed up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and it will continue to be messed up until even after i have it<br />razors85: my entire life is messed up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: o wow<br />razors85: good for u<br />razors85: u coulda avoided this<br />razors85: lol<br />HawaiianPunch 00: stop saying lol<br />HawaiianPunch 00: youre driving me nuts<br />razors85: no<br />razors85: ill pass thanks though for the offer<br />HawaiianPunch 00: see<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you want this to be a fight<br />razors85: no<br />razors85: i want to go<br />razors85: i have to get up in 5and a half hours<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're not being held here<br />razors85: well u know what i said before then<br />razors85: ill take care of it when i can and forever how long i can<br />razors85: theres not promise here<br />HawaiianPunch 00: nice try<br />razors85: suck it up<br />razors85: its life<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you suck it up<br />razors85: im good<br />HawaiianPunch 00: when you're home from college you have your baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: end of story<br />razors85: really now<br />HawaiianPunch 00: if you have to work, ok, i'll take it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but when you're done, it's yours for the rest of the night<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and until you go back to work<br />razors85: hahaha<br />razors85: who says im goign to do this/<br />HawaiianPunch 00: then givve me 600 dollars every month<br />HawaiianPunch 00: the law says this<br />razors85: lol<br />razors85: see its about what u want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's about the fact that you're going to be in your kids life<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc that's what's best for the kid<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i'm sick of you thinking it's ok to get me pregnant and laugh it off<br />razors85: and its what u want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and try everything you can to get rid of it<br />razors85: really i love how u think its ok to lie to someone so u can have sex u sick fuck<br />razors85: and now im trying everythign so it doesnt screw up our lives<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i didn't lie to have sex with you<br />razors85: oh really now<br />razors85: u knew i didnt want tdo unless u wer on it<br />razors85: and u werent<br />razors85: so u didnt etell me<br />razors85: so u lied<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you can't just expect to ignore me and have the baby disappear<br />razors85: cause i told u to tell me if u werent on it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're going to be a dad no matter how much you try to run<br />razors85: oh i know<br />razors85: unless someting goes wrong<br />HawaiianPunch 00: no i meant even if you didn't pay and didn't take care of it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's always yours<br />razors85: yeah i know<br />razors85: but none of those are gonan happen<br />razors85: cause its about u and it<br />HawaiianPunch 00: it's about the baby<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i dont' want to be stuck with you or your family for the next 18 years<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and even after that<br />razors85: oh there will be no after that<br />HawaiianPunch 00: when they get married<br />HawaiianPunch 00: have kids<br />razors85: ok?<br />HawaiianPunch 00: unless you plan on never talking to them after they turn 18<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i doubt you can spend 18 years taking care of your own child, and not care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i don't believe you<br />razors85: u dont ahve to<br />razors85: idk what im doing yet<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you can act like a toughass that doesn't care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but i think if you saw the things i've seen, you'd care<br />HawaiianPunch 00: or when you hold that baby, you'll care<br />razors85: mabye i will<br />razors85: maybe i wont<br />razors85: idk yet<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i think you know you will<br />razors85: liek i said i live live day by day<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you're not that bad of a person<br />razors85: oh thanks<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and if you are, you've had me completely fooled<br />HawaiianPunch 00: but really, i think you'll be surprised how much you'll end up caring<br />razors85: no<br />razors85: if i do... id still hate u<br />HawaiianPunch 00: thanks<br />razors85: anytime<br />HawaiianPunch 00: you really don't have any real reasons to hate me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: except i didn't do what you want<br />HawaiianPunch 00: wow<br />HawaiianPunch 00: tough luck<br />razors85: no i do<br />razors85: its my choice to tell u them or not<br />razors85: and i choose not to<br />razors85: so u can believe me or u cant<br />razors85: i dont care<br />razors85: cause i know and u dont<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i wouldnt get an abortion<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i wont give it up<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i wont let you just walk around<br />HawaiianPunch 00: good reasons<br />HawaiianPunch 00: really<br />HawaiianPunch 00: bc i didn't tell you i messed up my birth control. i bet thats number 1<br />HawaiianPunch 00: i'm a selfish bitch<br />HawaiianPunch 00: which is funny, considering everything i'm doing is for the wellbeing of this child<br />razors85: u can say whatever u want<br />razors85: i knw what they are<br />HawaiianPunch 00: ooooooook then<br />razors85: bye<br />HawaiianPunch 00: o you'll be hearing from me<br />HawaiianPunch 00: and i hope soon you can quit making everything such a fight<br />razors85: lol<br />HawaiianPunch 00: alex<br />razors85: bye<br />HawaiianPunch 00: quit<br />HawaiianPunch 00: being<br />HawaiianPunch 00: like this<br />razors85: hahaha funny cause ur makign me liek this<br />razors85 signed off at 12:00:17 AM.</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/425110500605356774-5444453150266169013?l=ashley-thejourney.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Ashleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00855980162476429964noreply@blogger.com0